author notes for Tourniquet + a fanmix!

  • Oct. 22nd, 2011 at 11:58 PM
neomeruru: (the end is nigh)
I wrote a thing! That thing I wrote is Tourniquet, aka 'zombieboyfrands', and I wrote it for the Hallowe'en issue of Shousetsu Bang*Bang. Original queer fiction! Zombies! You know the drill! I'll do a big post later about this issue of SSBB and all the goodness it contains, but this entry here is just for Tourniquet.

Behind the cut are just the author notes for the story. But also behind the cut is something way better: a melancholy mini-mix for when the zombie apocalypse comes and fucks up your shit and all you want to do is sit down and have a good cry.

So Tourniquet started when I got this crazy idea that someone could survive after being bitten by a zombie if they managed to remove the limb before the virus traveled to the brain. And then I thought, wow, I'd be pretty fucking pissed off if that happened, if I was like a front-line soldier in a zombie war or something. I'd probably also ask for the strongest opiates available if someone was chopping off my arm! And probably get addicted to them! And I should throw in some gay, so I can write it for SSBB!

Yeah, a heroin-addicted, one-armed, bastard soldier and the man who inexplicably loves him, that's a great story!

And then I realized I was writing Yellow Fever, and I had to drop everything I was doing and go apologize to [ profile] ladysisyphus right away.

(If you haven't read Yellow Fever, you should. I'll wait.)

So a few nights later I was telling the story of my near-miss plagiarism to my husband as we were just about to drift off, and he asked me: why not just write it anyway? So we talked and talked, and on a sweltering night in mid-August I got up and I wrote seven pages of just the outline, replacing heroin for rats. And enough people told me it didn't suck, so here we are.

True facts: the filename for this story was zombieboyfrands, and thus it will always be so in my head.

Also true facts: the last story I wrote was basically breathplay snuff, and this is basically thinly-veiled vore fantasy. God, there is so much wrong with my brain wiring.

Many thanks are in order to [ profile] eternalsojourn and [ profile] ladysisyphus for, as mentioned, assuring me it does not suck. And for cheerfully perforating the parts that did suck, so now perhaps they do not suck as much anymore. If there is any weakness in the story, then rest assured it is my own, because they did their level best to take it to the ground, and I am most appreciative.

This is literally the longest thing I've ever written -- it surpassed my thesis, even. And it has, like, a plot and everything. So I kind of like it, and it's kind of tender at the same time! I hope you like(d) reading it. Or, at the very least, it made you do the mental equivalent of reading through your fingers. That's mission accomplished for me.

Also, hello, three pieces of incredible art by [ profile] lihsa, who heard my battle cry of 'I'm writing a gross thing!' and was not afraid to sign on. Her art blows me away, and if you have some time, please leave a comment for her too. You don't even have to comment on my story if you don't want, that's fine, but she did a great job and it takes significantly less time to look at a picture than it does to read 15k. :D

Without further ado, I have made a fanmix! While not specifically about Tourniquet, they're definitely all about the whole zombie apocalypse theme, and I listened to them while writing, so there's that!

Failure to Thrive
a melancholy mix for the zombie apocalypse

A song for leaving it behind or carrying it with you:
Wye Oak - Civilian
I wanted to give you everything / but I still stand in awe of superficial things
I wanted to love you like my mother's mother's mothers did - Civilian

A song for the empty places:
Matt Good - Empty's Theme Park
Hold me like you'd never let me go
Bear it like you'd never let it show
Shine a light and so never let me go
Never let me go

A song for exhaustion:
Godspeed You Black Emperor - East Hastings

A song for acceptance:
Alexander - Truth
I've grown up some / Different kind of fighter
And when the darkness come let it inside you

A song for the last one alive:
A Silver Mt. Zion - Lonely as the Sound

A song for the end credits:
Radiohead - Videotape
No matter what happens now
I shouldn't be afraid

disclaimer: music provided for trial purposes only; please delete in twenty-four hours if you care about such things. If you like the music, please support the artist by purchasing their music off of iTunes or somehow convincing your local CD store to order freaking Godspeed You Black Emperor, good luck.

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